Things that annoy me about Zombies

As my Zombie hunting rabbit says, “Zombies are ‘noying, ‘cause they don’t bake donuts.”   

But that is not the only reason to be critical of the wandering undead.  Here are a few more…

• They are always groaning about something.
• They don’t speak the truth.
• They’re clearly lost but won’t ask for directions.
• Everything is a deadline to them.
• Just because they play chase you around the block, ONE TIME, they think they own your brain and body.
• It costs an arm and a leg to keep them satisfied.
• You can’t give them a “piece of your mind” without them wanting all of it.
• Zombies are incredibly messy. I mean really, no self-respect.
• They never give you private space.  Sooo clingy!
• Zombies are bad spellers.
• They have a one-track mind, uhh, unmind.
• Zombies never laugh.
• They never shower.
• They don’t bake anything… including donuts.

After all that it’s only fair that we try to say something nice about Zombies, so here it is - They never talk about Crossfit.